A week or so ago...
Waking up is such a simple daily task. We all do it, right? Sometimes I don't know where to begin with it. Today I started with waking up and letting life in. I have felt that I have simply been living an out of body experience. Like Bill Murray's character in Groundhogs Day. But in my life it didn't seem to get better each day, because the more I tried the worse I felt and further away I got from people and myself. Sunday I had myself a wonderful pity party and kept complaining about how the Grinch stole my happiness. Again, the more I tried to think about the advice friends gave me the more I kept feeling inadequate about who I was (Hardly ever happens too).
However this morning was different. Waking up not at my usual time, I rolled around hating the alarm and thought: 'Great, here we go again Rekann, maybe, just maybe you won't have to force a smile. And maybe you will be ok, want to give it a try?. Haha no...give me 10 more minutes. In fact forget today, let's just try tomorrow.' My usual conversation for the past month or so. I got out of bed and started my step by step routine. Step 1, get out of bed...step 2, shower and get ready...step 3, so back to sleep for a bit and try again. Today there was no step 3.
There are times in your life where you think you are invisible and your life has no impact in this world because it is so HUGE. I was at that moment for almost a month. It took some amazing people who showed me that my life is noticeable. Maybe not CNN large but in my own little world it is HUGE.
Series of wonderful events:
My sweet dream
pulchritudinous - physically beautiful; comely
Erica - jib jab videos
Dinner with Swanson's and Buzz Lightyear's movable fingers!
Waking up is such a simple daily task. We all do it, right? Sometimes I don't know where to begin with it. Today I started with waking up and letting life in. I have felt that I have simply been living an out of body experience. Like Bill Murray's character in Groundhogs Day. But in my life it didn't seem to get better each day, because the more I tried the worse I felt and further away I got from people and myself. Sunday I had myself a wonderful pity party and kept complaining about how the Grinch stole my happiness. Again, the more I tried to think about the advice friends gave me the more I kept feeling inadequate about who I was (Hardly ever happens too).
However this morning was different. Waking up not at my usual time, I rolled around hating the alarm and thought: 'Great, here we go again Rekann, maybe, just maybe you won't have to force a smile. And maybe you will be ok, want to give it a try?. Haha no...give me 10 more minutes. In fact forget today, let's just try tomorrow.' My usual conversation for the past month or so. I got out of bed and started my step by step routine. Step 1, get out of bed...step 2, shower and get ready...step 3, so back to sleep for a bit and try again. Today there was no step 3.
There are times in your life where you think you are invisible and your life has no impact in this world because it is so HUGE. I was at that moment for almost a month. It took some amazing people who showed me that my life is noticeable. Maybe not CNN large but in my own little world it is HUGE.
Series of wonderful events:
My sweet dream
pulchritudinous - physically beautiful; comely
Erica - jib jab videos
Dinner with Swanson's and Buzz Lightyear's movable fingers!
Comments
Post a Comment